1. I looked into her eyes and realized my small victory was her major defeat. I took a moral stand and decimated her morale.
2. David Lee Roth is to musicians what hairballs are to pets.
3. Anatomical terms should not be used outside a classroom. Profanity is the privilege of the populace. Vulgarity is not the tool of the vacuous; it’s the verbiage of the vivid.
4. Why do women get custody of the mementos? I have no evidence of my existence outside my skin and scarred soul.
5. I can’t lighten up. I’m deadly serious because all I see is death.
6. “Honey, you’ve got yourself a sweet face” the geriatric bartender said as she patted my cheek. I’m too old to be patronized. She’s too old to have a patron.
7. They say men don’t listen. Yes we do. I listened to it 8 times and then I erased it.