Wednesday, May 19, 2010


I have a handicapped parking permit now. It's for 6 years. It's broken my heart. I asked my podiatrist if I needed it. I wanted him to tell me I didn't. But, he told me I did.

And in that moment I lost hope.

I know that it's a silly thing to be upset about - but it's just a huge new loss to me. It just screams it won't get better. I know that's childish. So tomorrow I'll be grown-up and see the good of everything. But tonight I'm going out. I'm going to sit beside my buddy. And he's going to listen to all my unsaid words. That's the plan for tonight.

Please don't tell me the good part. I don't want to see the good part today. Today I want to mourn.

And tomorrow I have a new rule: no more talk of loss and pain and all that shit.

Tomorrow, we hope again.

See you tomorrow.