Thursday, September 16, 2010

The Ten Best Things On Earth

I got a text message from my buddy Mike:

“God bless beer, the 2 cycle engine, and sundresses.”

My answer? Amen. That’s perfect. But those are his words, not mine.

So. Here is my list of The Ten Best Things On Earth:

1. Sex
2. Cigarettes
3. Singing
4. Cocaine
5. A woman who fucks back.
6. Baby giggles
7. A loyal dog
8. Cold water.
9. A rocking chair
10. Meat

1. No brainer.
2. It’s why so many people do it. I quit. I don’t miss them. But I’m not stupid.
3. Stop reading now. Stand up. Start singing at the top of your lungs. See? Great fun.
4. Did not does. I’m a child of the 70s.
5. I like women who intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, and sexually fuck me back. Fuck me - we’ll date. Fuck my brain - we’ll marry.
6. It’s the greatest sound on earth.
7. My buddy reminded me of this. Absolute fact.
8. Hot day / extreme thirst - nothing beats it.
9. It’s the rhythm. It soothes.
10. Cooked. My ancestors embraced the discovery of fire.