Sunday, October 3, 2010

Autumnal Random Thoughts

            » An honest relationship status on Facebook? You want real? Let me check "she's complicated." or "she's fucking my head."

            » I hate math. I don't want to figure out how things add up. I don't want to subtract anything from my life. I hate divisions in our society. And multiplied is only good in orgasms.

            » Okay so most people don't know when it's necessary to land the plane. I get that. What I find so perplexing is that so few people understand that they just can't land the plane on any runway they choose.

            » It might be the brandy but I'll put my balls on the line and say “Danke Schoen” is one of the top five best tunes that I can think of while drunk.

            » Don't tell a woman "there's two sides to a Qtip" when she pitches a partially used one in the trashcan. Just ... um ... don't.

            » You know you're in a bad relationship when after sex your woman lights her smoke while humming a spiritual.

            » Do you know that social networking has emerged as the most prevalent method for the propagation of the news? "Reporters" became "Reposters." Before you post a link to an article or post a quote or push either political party - why not check your source for credibility or prejudice? Let's take a little responsibility for which seeds we spew.